Chinese Phoenix Rising

I admit that I’m one of those New York snobs who, when visiting a foreign land, only wants to sample the local flavors. For instance, when I’m in the Southwest, I prefer to stick to Southwestern fare with a flair.

Well, on my recent trip to Phoenix, AZ, I was pleasantly surprised by a delicious journey into an even more foreign land–an upscale Chinese chain restaurant! You can’t get more foreign than that now, can you?!

[n.b. in my perpetual effort to not offend anyone, I am writing this in a tongue-in-cheek tone. Just so you know. Don’t want to confuse anyone!]

Ahem, now, back to our regularly scheduled writing…

So. Paul Lee’s Chinese Restaurant in Phoenix was very good. I’d give it 3 Flying Roosters.

However, our waiter, Trent Larson, now he’s really worth a write-up! Since this blog is about food, I’ll have to talk about that a little bit. But I’d rather talk about Trent.

Let’s start with his name. Ah, “Trent.” What a lovely, studly name! And “Larson.” Such a wholesome, happy name. Lars-son. I guess he might herald from a nordic country where his father was named Lars (if we were disseticting this a few centuries ago).

Trent is one of those adorable, all-American, go-getter types of boys. He was charming…

…ahem. Sorry. Focus Courtney! Okay. He approached our table with a broad smile and proudly announced, “Good evening, my name is Trent and I’ll be your server for the night.” Mmmmm…my server!

Not a moment later, Ms. Tery announced that not only were we guests dining in the restaurant, but we were also dining critics.

Trent didn’t need a lot of prodding. (oh! I just said prodding! Can I say that in a food blog?) With that introduction he proudly announced, “well, I’m actually just working her part-time. My real business is my catering company. Phat Racks Catering.”

Catering Company? Oh really? Our curiosity was piqued even more.

“Yes,” the tall, strapping young man continued. “I specialize in mouthwatering ribs and I have it all set up on my new fancy truck that I’m having sent down from Vancouver.”

Oooooh! Well, Trent was not only attentive to our food at this restaurant, but he also was attentive to us…er, the girls.

“So, are you all from around here?” he asks innocently as he peers directly into my eyes.

Gulp. “Well, I’m here visiting friends.”

On another visit to our table, we also found out that Trent is 24, divorced, owns a big fancy house, a few more trucks and is going into business with his brother. He pointed out his brother but we couldn’t discern which one he was because all the servers “back there” were moving about so quickly. Was it because there was a fire in the kitchen?

We also learned that the catering business in Phoenix is booming. “There are so many events going on each night in this town that you couldn’t possibly get to them all,” Trent explained as Tery probed deeper into his business plans. Is it because there really are so many fabulous and amazing events going on? Or is it because Phoenix is such a wide-spread city?

In any case. After our very tasty meal, we got ready to depart.

Trent was such a gentleman that he ran over to the door to open it for me. And me, being oblivious to what his intentions were, made a diversion to the reception desk to get a matchbook. Tery, Mr. and Mrs. Spataro all marched outside, thanking Trent for holding the door for them.

I realized my gaffe and quickly scurried to the door. Wanting Trent to feel okay, I lingered outside with him for a moment…

His strong, masculine hands grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me in close. As he leaned in for what I’d been really craving all night, his sweet minty breath was the oxygen I’ve been craving. He kissed me hard, and it felt so good. My skin began tingling (sort of like it is right now!) and I shivered as I felt a slight cool breeze on my bare legs. The Spataros pulled up in their car, so I whispered a breathless “call me soon, Trent” in his ear before I pulled away, and was whisked off into the night by the silver chariot…

…Excuse me while I go take a cold shower now.

Oh. The food at Paul Lee’s chinese restaurant was really good too. But not as good as Trent’s ribs, I can tell you that!

Here’s yet another review.

And here are some key-wordsin this blog: eat, delicious, probe, deeper, upscale, tongue-in-cheek, Flying Roosters, herald, adorable, all-American, go-getter, boys, charming, broad, server, critics, prodding, laid, strapping, mouthwatering, ribs, fancy, truck, kiss…

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