It’s My Parsley And I’ll Cry If I Want To

afshincries
For most people, few waking activities surpass eating as a source of pure pleasure and contentment. America’s expanding waistline testifies to that. But if you’re Matt or Ryan or Christy or one of 15 other strangers at Crying While Eating, nothing could be sadder.

In this extremely odd series of online videos, a gaggle of apparently unconnected young people sobb uncontrollably as they devour fried chicken, Tater Tots, Cheerios and even double chocolate Mint Milano cookies. Some weep about the state of their lives (Tashi frets that “sex will never be that good again”) while others indulge more existential angst (Afshin bemoans that there just aren’t “enough positive news stories”). It’s enough to make a person, well, cry in his soup.

Still, most of the tears are unconvincing, though Giacomo’s is perhaps the only truly heart-wrenching tale. As he tries to finish a tunafish sandwich — to the strains of a funeral dirge — he must come to terms with the fact that he’s never actually liked fish.

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